the intricacies of being good part 2

To continue from where i left off...everything that went bad is now getting better. The friend is talking to me again and still loves me :). God is awesome!!!! I guess sometimes are testing times and sometimes He just wants to show us things that are right under our noses, that we still haven't noticed....( dumb as i can be sometimes) and He gives and He takes away but there is always a lesson. Maybe it's just intervention before we do damage that is irreparable.

However if you're looking at this as a payoff for being good, you're wrong. there shouldn't have to be any. We've become so goal oriented that we look for successes everywhere. And to add to that we want the easy way out. But it's all bout perspective sometimes. What may seem like failure might just be success behind a cloud. ;).

So keep looking... May you find all your rainbows... Sometimes you may not think there are any... but maybe just maybe, you have to wait for some rain first.

Keep the faith!!!

the intricacies of being good

Very recently i decided to make a positive change in my life, something that i had been contemplating for a while.There had been halfhearted attempts in that direction before but.... this was the REAL thing. There are just these few moments in my life when I know with utter conviction that there is something that i must do. It was not that this was a particularly easy decision to make, it was just that i reached a point where i would be a hypocrite no more!!!! (at least in this area of my life :P)

At first there was a warm glow inside me, the nice feeling that i was doing something good. Things began to go downhill rather rapidly after that. Something i said was misunderstood and a close friend thought i was a liar, maybe even a hypocrite ....actually i really wouldn't know cuz he's not talking to me right now....

Being good seems to be a lot more trouble than its worth right??? So why even try??? That's cuz as much as i may try to deny it sometimes...my conscience does have a lotta say in my life ... and when it is quiet, the silence is deafening, which another recent realisation. Another good reason to be good is that i unblock the block between God n me...which i put up , kinda like a screen that supposed to allow me to do things without him seeing me...even though i know that he can see anyway...lol jus another one of some of the futile things that i do that make me, me. And last but not the least i have this feeling of peace, of oneness with the world and I'm happy even though I'm miserable...contradictory huh!!!but yeah....